My Dearest Komal, Anjli and Amar,
As it is Rakshabandhan today, it is appropriate for me to bring up the subject of your longest relationship in life:
It is an intrinsic bond, which like in any other relationship, needs to be cultivated continuously. Remember each of you have different strong points. Use those to deepen the bond.
Childhood relationships prepare individuals for their future life. This is where you learn to share your living space, pick up skills to play, fight, negotiate, make-up, share, back down, etc etc. Sibling relationship helps shape ones self image. You know each other the best and can be your best resource for help and for solving personal problems. Here are a few tips that would help you immensely in nurturing your sibling relationship. These same tips are also useful in deepening and maintaining any other personal bonds: partners, friends and even parents! As always I take a lot of inspiration from the ‘Marc & Angel Hack Life‘ blog.
- Stick together through thick and thin. Be supportive. No one else will do the same: not your career, not your boss, not your clients, not money and not fame. Stand by each other in the darkest moments as well as the brightest. Allow THEM to shine brightly.
- The deepest craving for human nature is the need to be appreciated as is. So appreciate them as they are.
- To nurture sibling relationship, you need to nurture your own relationship with yourself! Take responsibility of your own happiness. Choose to do something meaningful, take care of your body, be around the right people, have a positive attitude, be grateful, be forgiving and above all, choose to focus on what you have rather than what you don’t.
- Always communicate using caring words. An unkind word will be said in a second but remembered for eternity. Be honest, use words that build up, appreciate, encourage and inspire.
- Keep your promises and uphold truths. Lying and cheating( to yourself or your siblings) will hurt the most and become reasons for breaking up relations. Saying sorry after broken promises will mean nothing. Never mess with someone’s feelings just because you are unsure of your own. Be always open and honest. When truth is replaced by silence, silence becomes a lie too!
- Set aside quality time to share with your loved ones. You will miss them when they are gone. Express your love and feelings now, don’t later regret lost opportunities. Communicate openly and regularly. They are worth the extra effort.
- Build and maintain ties, nurture them with love. Everyday.
- Go out of your way for each other. Shower your bonds with attention, awareness, discipline and effort. Sacrifice for them. Be prepared to do something you dislike in order to make them happy.
- Practice patience and forgiveness every day. Patience and forgiveness can be bitter at first, but the seeds you sow now will bear sweet fruit in the end.
Next time we are together, remind me to play for you an old Hindi song on the meaning of rakshabandhan. It is so meaningful and brings tears to my eyes. Rakshabandhan is always translated as a ‘brother’s day’, but in essence it is a sibling’s day. I am very lucky to have loving and caring siblings who are always there for me and shower me with love and eternal support. Hope you can say the same for yours.
Well so long for now. All my very best to you all.